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With every swig I take, the memory fades,

With every tot I have, the pain is erased,

I am running from the past, the memory, your ghost,

In this world, you do not exist, you were never there,

I have no more pain, I am living.


I am alive, I am happy, I have so many friends,

Johnnie always walks with me, barley always refreshes me,

They are the kind of friends I need, unlike the ones I have,

They are always there, available everywhere and going nowhere,

They do not hurt, neglect, wound or die.


I feel great, this high makes me smile,

The laughter is intoxicating, it makes my heart beat faster,

The joy I feel runs in my body, in my blood,

In this moment, I have no wounds, pain or memory: just joy,

In this world, no one can hurt me.


I have a new family, we share the same goals,

They don’t ask, judge or wander why I do this,

We just party and drink till sleep or exhaustion sets it,

And they always take me along to the next party,

Unlike my old friends who whine, disappear or don’t even care.


I go to bed with new memories, happy memories,

In my dreams, I wander to a land of blankness, of no thoughts,

I can finally sleep without thinking, pondering, remembering,

My mind is at rest, my body is relieved,

Until I wake up to the reality that nothing has changed.